I’ve written before about my rather repressed upbringing and lack of self-love. Sometimes I wonder what people who didn’t grow up like that must think. Maybe they don’t believe that a girl could go her whole life without ever touching herself. Or that there are women who die never having had an orgasm. But they’re out there, and for their sake, I’m so excited to be living in the twenty-first century.
No longer surprised…
The other day a woman in a Facebook group showed us her list of things she does to wind down. Stuff like hot baths, yoga, having a beer, masturbating…
I’m no longer shocked about it, but I would have been ten years ago. I love that we live in a world where women can openly proclaim that no matter what we look like or how smart we are or how much society doesn’t want to acknowledge it…we are sexual.
What We Finally Know
You can read from others more knowledgable than me about the history of the female orgasm. You can also find out all about the earliest vibrators and their modern counterparts. And if you’re still confused about the frequently misconceived size, shape, and function of the clitoris, you’re not to blame given that the first 3D MRI representation only became available in 2009. Thankfully we have artists and advocates bringing conversation about the clitoris to the forefront, shedding light on this subject even in a world where people are so ashamed they cut it out of classic literature–a literary cliteridectomy.
Make Valentine’s Day about YOU
With all this education and support, I don’t see why we shouldn’t make Valentine’s Day at least a little bit about loving ourselves. Whether you’re alone or partnered, sexual pleasure is a human right and you don’t have to wait on anyone else to enjoy it. So on that note, here are a few ideas for enjoying your Valentine’s Day solo:
Read A Good Book
If you know Venus Scribe at all, you know we’re very interested in the intersection of romance and feminism. We believe that writing romance is an empowering act, a liberating act, and so is reading it. Romance novels have had a wide range of positive effects on women, from simple escapism to sexual awakening to empowerment…there’s no wrong way to read a romance novel. Plus, they’re hot.
Try Something New
Get a new toy. Try a new position. Branch out with some new porn. Or if you’re feeling a little lacking in the creativity department, there are how-to videos to give you some ideas.
Join A Self-Love Community
It’s pretty easy to find masturbation techniques and suggestions on the internet, but for those of you just now tip-toeing into this brave new world, just want you to know you’re not alone. There are plenty of women talking about this and taking charge of their pleasure. You can too.
Begin A Self-Love Practice
Yoga, more than anything, is teaching me that tending to your sexual energy is about more than momentary pleasure. It’s part of a whole-life practice that involves connecting with your spiritual self and with something greater than yourself. It’s about tapping into an energy that can sustain your joy, creativity, sexuality, and many other aspects of your life. So why not use this day to adopt a new philosophy of pleasure and initiate a sustainable practice?